Disciplining Your Wives, Sexually

I understand that not every man has five wives like me. The first four or five left. They are still mine- they will be bad. I mean- BACK. Ah huh. Anillah was from Spain. She taught me how to deliver pain with mockery. Then she bolted. Ow.

So she was struck by lightening in a cornfield near my castle. What a hassle! So I married her step-aunt Wendy. Wendy taught me how to go out-of-body when a woman yells at me. Nice! She did me twice that way, but we never consummated… except for that time in the Sears tower viewing floor after closing. She was a bell hop.

So “How To Discipline your wife sexually”? You don’t need 50 lamp shades of gay woman fantasy or a BOOK. I teach “The Look”. You get half-dead from their woe-dance when the bills come in… and you try not to SIN… you just PUT IT IN, a cd of polka music.

Then women cry. A REAL woman will strip!- A German woman is kinkified- YOU CAN USE THIS on the English, Russians (connected sexually to Germany up the gas pipeline- so close to RIPE for a fruit plow), Arabic, African always ready (learn), Icelandic (slutty once you get to cuddle), Canadian (love the A), South American (shy because they want to force a man’s brain out… really- they need real spankings. Ask first or they’ll knead your Brazillian shaven nuts), where am I??…

I cannot say any more. Just do this, guys:

Tape a picture of Lord Sean Connery on the mirror

Compare

Keep working it

Ladies, if you read this- NAUGHTG YOU

You are cheatin’

My writing IS ESSENTIAL ESSEN AND SEXUAL punishment!!-

Go to you man, BOTTOMLESS…

Sit on his khakis and clap

And beg for it

Get that lily mojito rollin’

If he pulls out his Shaolin staff, laugh

Be a bitch

Giggle and wiggle for Halloween

Cold or red hot hell supreme

Hallowed Hades

You can even make a hell baby

But eat your punishment like a rockstar

This shit is coed

Goodnight

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