Running With Scissors In A Yarn-spinning Factory

Hi!

Do you ever dream of being “precisely negative”? Vocalizing things in your own private arena of annihilation? Really? Wow! TMI! Did I just read your thoughts? I certainly hope not. I already took a bath… selling it on E-bay… claw-toe. Ugh.

Here are a few scenarios of “total hopelessness”:

#1

Mad Max uses steel cable to tie your head to the bumper of a Mack Truck. He sets a bomb for 10 minutes. The cable takes TWELVE minutes to cut thru, but your neck only takes five. Wow!

#2

Your wife goes into labor at the zoo. YOU are stuck behind an elephant crammed in the entryway. Luckily there is a trampoline salesman at the wall. Your wife gives birth in the penguin habitat. YOU are confused and watch a seal give birth TWO HABITATS AWAY! There is more, but this it rated G. Rated PG. Okay… rated R! But I still cannot tell you what happened. But you saw it.

#3

Were the Crocodile Hunter and Crocodile Dundee friends? Probably. Have you ever thought of this? Probably not. I’m sorry, but c’mon… C-R-O-C-O-D-I-L-E. Bah! Hopeless.

#2

Winding down to the number one “Hopeless Scenario”, what if the “Happy Days” mom “Marion” and Marge Simpson met? What if they met? What if… they…

#1

You successfully run thru a “yarn-spinning” factory with a GIANT scissors SAFELY, but at the end you realize you are only a spool o

f y

a r

n.

Dang! Well, this is an exercise in futility. Its over forever.

Later, hash-taggers.

Luv,

Uncle Yuk

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